Dishoom: The Battle of the Beefcakes

This year a popular brand is introducing some new categories in their film awards and I thought I might help them with the finalists.

Best lead Actor in a static role: John Abraham for Dishoom- He manages to keep the same expression throughout the movie, a feat which not even accomplished actors like Naseer have been able to do. For this, he has even managed to get a lifetime award nomination competing strongly with Sunil Shetty. Moreover, his abs have started acting better though a similar feat was attempted by his bare bottom earlier. The director had to give him a cigarette throughout the movie to ensure that he didn’t give any unwanted expressions either.Continue reading “Dishoom: The Battle of the Beefcakes”

Dishoom Movie Review: Typical ‘Entertainer’ that Respects Your Time for a Change

Rohit Dhawan is an interesting name for a Hindi film director. The man obviously gets his surname from his iconic father, David, but it is his first name which lends an aura of interest to this entire name business. Rohit Dhawan seems to be inspired by ‘100 crore’ man Rohit Shetty and his stylized action sequences, and when you mix it with the inherent David Dhawan brand of humor and a bit of more inspiration from Hollywood buddy movies, you have the brand new Dhawan on the block.Continue reading “Dishoom Movie Review: Typical ‘Entertainer’ that Respects Your Time for a Change”

Dishoom Movie Review: Sucker Punch

In the midst of all the offbeat plots covered by Bollywood in 2016, like Kapoor and Sons, Ki and Ka, Neerja, Udta Punjab etc, there are times when one ends up craving for some old school masala, although lately, it’s only the Khans who’ve managed to keep the genre alive, especially with Salman Khan’s Sultan ending up as a monster hit. So when the trailers of Dishoom showed up, they promised old school masala with a mix of maar dhaad action and some David Dhawan styled humor, but does Dishoom deliver on this promise?Continue reading “Dishoom Movie Review: Sucker Punch”

Hero (2015) Movie Review: Boring Drivel

We are living in fluid flux ridden times, we Indians. We are. In almost every public sphere of life and existence, there is a decided shift against inheritance and for merit. Be it politics, business or even smaller work spaces, the idea of letting sons take over your mantle whether they deserve it or not is fast losing the social acceptance it enjoyed all these years.Continue reading “Hero (2015) Movie Review: Boring Drivel”

Kill/Dil(2014) Movie Review: The Guns Came Empty

Language : Hindi | Running Time : 127 Minutes | Director : Shaad Ali

As a child, the movies I was forced to watch on TV because my mom liked the movies she was brought up on were usually Hindi films that had a plot that went – Kid is found in trash bin, is raised by gangster under whose gun held care and tutelage the boy becomes a killer, one who is so good that he is called upon for the most difficult of kills and then he falls in love with a beautiful woman who shows him the light at the end of the tunnel. The boy then decides he has had enough of the dark side and tells his gangster guardian that he wants to take a rain-check from the bullets and guns and goes his own way only for the gangster then going after the boy and the boy reluctantly killing the gangster when the gangster tries harming the girl. People loved it, my mom did and so did I but this was from the 70s and some films even lived with this till the 80s.Continue reading “Kill/Dil(2014) Movie Review: The Guns Came Empty”

Dhoom 3 Movie Review: Kuch Bhi!!

Aamir Khan in Dhoom 3 with his hatWomen & Children first was the cry. People are to distance themselves from something that is a mix between Dhoom 1&2, Fast and the Furious, Prestige, Jumanji (Uday Chopra was the chimpanzee), the Road Runner and the Bugs and Daffy Show. Welcome to THE land where truth is stranger than fiction.

Despite my ranting, my ravings, my warnings and all that is good and holy in this world, my fears came true. I ended up seeing Uday Chopra in a larger than life avatar and sadly no amount of Katrina’s legs can make up for this.

For those still contemplating (and the few of you who read my reviews regularly) I always give a brief about the story and here it is:Chase Scene…Dance…Chase Scene…Katrina Kaif….Dance…Chase Scene….Katrina Kaif…Dance….(Intermission)….Dance…Katrina Kaif…Dance…Dance again….random talk…Aamir Khan kills himself. The End.

I guess you could figure out that wasn’t accurate. I wish I could say the same. Continue reading “Dhoom 3 Movie Review: Kuch Bhi!!”

Dhoom 3: Dud With No Fizzle and No Bang

Language : Hindi | Running Time : 172 minutes | Director : Vijay Krishna Acharya

Katrina Stripping for Aamir KhanThere’s a tightrope between two buildings and we have Aamir Khan‘s bike riding on a thin rope. The bike could fall either way, if logic existed but in a bid to defeat Rohit Shetty at his own game and to stoop lower than Torque or Fast and Furious ever would, the bike stays up and we have an action sequence executed. Instead of building a sense of excitement and have adrenaline wash us over, we are trying hard not to laugh too loud so that some 5 year old who hasn’t watched movies is not disturbed and also at the same time trying hard to clear ourselves of the disbelief that it is Aamir Khan performing this sequence. Dhoom 3 offers us many more such moments. The makers and the director,Vijay Krishna Acharya, seem to have taken the circus  and Jackie Shroff‘s puppy dog eyes to heart and decided to walk the tightrope with this film and they walk it for the first 5 minutes, after which it falls flat, flatter than the wooden expressions of Uday Chopra.
Continue reading “Dhoom 3: Dud With No Fizzle and No Bang”

Dhoom 3: Slow Commotion

Director: Vijay Krishna Acharya
Rating: *

Dhoom 3- Aamir KhanMyyyyy brrrraaaaainnnn issssssssssssss wooorrrkkkkiiiinnnggg innnnn slooooooooow moooootionnnnnnn. I have been subject to so much of it during Dhoom 3 that walking at normal pace seems like a sprint to me now. In the third installment of this poor man’s action movie franchise, bikes chronically break through everything that comes in their path – doors, posters, walls. Always in slow-motion, always accompanied by the cacophonic Dhoom tune blaring in the background. In pursuit are some more bikes, also in slo-mo. Finally followed by police cars meant to crash against each other causing a huge pile up, all in slo-mo. If this nearly 3 hour film had all its sequences playing at actual speed, it wouldn’t need an interval.Continue reading “Dhoom 3: Slow Commotion”

Dhoom 3 Movie Review : An Overlong Circus of Ham and Cheese

Dhoom 3 PosterDhoom 3 is the most expected movie of the year, without a shred of doubt. More than Chennai Express or Krrish 3, there is an assured perception amongst everyone that it is indeed this film that will be the first one to reach the Rs 300Cr mark at the Box Office. And to be honest, it might just hit it as well, gauging from the blistering hype around it that is conspiring to make it happen. But one cannot ignore away the fact that this is a woebegone film. Well, in an alternate world, with Vivek Oberoi playing the villain here, it would have been subjected to less harsh criticism. But wait, it is Aamir Khan who is fronting this swansong of the series (or so we hope?) and one cannot allow a mishap here. Every single one of us want this movie to rock. Dhoom 3 isnt a mishap, rather it is an intentional collision. Seriously, WHY? Continue reading “Dhoom 3 Movie Review : An Overlong Circus of Ham and Cheese”