Tag Archives: Akiv Ali

Padmaavat Movie Review: A Perfumed Gust of Regressive Flatulence

Directed by: Sanjay Leela Bhansali (the all-pervasive purveyor of aesthetic nonsense)

Starring: Deepika Padukone (the pristine princess), Ranveer Singh (the chicken loving, dirty faced psychotic tyrant), Shahid Kapoor (the clean faced paragon of Rajput valor and lack of practical sense)

Before I begin, let me say that in this review (to some it may seem an elaborate rant, but I need to give vent to my headache at spending big bucks for this movie), I may not make much effort to hide spoilers for 2 reasons – Firstly, as everyone knows the story from school history lessons or if you were not paying attention, I’m sure the Karni Sena would have ensured you now know everything there is to know;  Secondly, most who wanted to watch the film for whatever reasons would have already done so by now, and those who are yet to watch should be allowed to save their time and money.Continue reading “Padmaavat Movie Review: A Perfumed Gust of Regressive Flatulence”

Jagga Jasoos Movie Review: Arrested Development

Let’s be honest here, as a desi audience that’s grown up on Bollywood Masala, we are definitely no strangers to the musical. But in Jagga Jasoos, director Anurag Basu tries to push the envelope by presenting most of the movie in tune and verse, an attempt to bring Broadway to Bollywood, something we probably last saw in Shirish Kunder’s equally befuddling debut effort, Jaan-E-Mann. But with an experienced hand such as Basu at the realm, some stunning cinematography by Ravi Varman, as promised in the promos, a promising soundtrack by Pritam, and an extremely good-looking starcast, does this audacious experiment work?Continue reading “Jagga Jasoos Movie Review: Arrested Development”

Raees vs Kaabil: Clash of the Titans?

Jan 25th was slated to be the battle of the stars- Shahrukh and Hrithik battling it out with Raees and Kaabil respectively. The swords were all out with both the parties battling it out with their PR machinery. Some even called it as a mentor-pupil battle. And it mattered for both the stars as their previous movies were almost a washout (Fan and Mohenjo Daro).Continue reading “Raees vs Kaabil: Clash of the Titans?”

Brothers: A Quick Review

Brothers PosterBrothers- the official remake of ”Warrior”- sees Akshay Kumar in one of his best and intense roles. But trying to strike the balance between Bollywood and Hollywood, the director Karan Malhotra gets confused and gives us a mediocre version of what could have been a big blockbuster.Continue reading “Brothers: A Quick Review”

Brothers Movie Review: Mother of Yawns and False Dawns

I haven’t yawned this much while watching a film in a long long time. Yes, Brothers is a rare gem of a film in that sense. But, I have had this feeling of ‘when will this film end’ for so many other Hindi films that have released this year. Brothers is truly run-of-mill in that sense.

Karan Malhotra, the director who gave us the commercially successful but perennially boring remake of the 90s cult classic Agneepath, comes back with another remake in form of Brothers (official remake of 2011 Hollywood film Warrior and does exactly what he has done before – he bores us to death. Okay, near death (conceding the fact that I am still alive to write this review). At times, I struggle to respond to those ever-inquisitive souls who come up to you after you have watched a film and ask you – how was it? A film like Brothers makes your job easier– you can simply say ‘boring’ and the answer shall perfectly suffice.Continue reading “Brothers Movie Review: Mother of Yawns and False Dawns”

Bang Bang Movie Review: Bang for the Buck? Not Quite!

When I first heard of Hollywood hit Knight and Day (2010) being officially adapted in Hindi as “Bang Bang” I just sighed in semi disbelief.  In my opinion Knight and Day was a rather ordinary Hollywood entertainer, which only worked due to the lovely lead pair comprising of Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz. Well to be honest their Indian counterparts, Hrithik Roshan and Katrina Kaif seemed to be perfect choices to carry on the same roles in Hindi, but I was wondering why a studio like Fox Star had to not just look at shelling out money to buy the remake rights, but also want to invest mega bucks in a film which has no novelty as such. Adding to the gloomy scenario was the fact that the film was to be directed by Siddharth Anand, someone who has had moderate success making romantic films (Salaam Namaste, Tara Rum Pum, Bachna Ae Haseeno, Anjaana Anjaani). Considering this was to be an action film I was wondering why the studio would entrust the film to a director who’s never dabbled with the genre earlier.Continue reading “Bang Bang Movie Review: Bang for the Buck? Not Quite!”

Once Upon Ay Time in Mumbai Dobaara Movie Review: Twice the monstrosity and pain of movie watching

OUTIMAWhen Once upon a time in Mumbaai became successful , there was little doubt that the film would see a sequel very soon given the fact that the film was allegedly based on the life and times of the dreaded gangster Dawood Ibrahim. Continue reading “Once Upon Ay Time in Mumbai Dobaara Movie Review: Twice the monstrosity and pain of movie watching”

Once Upon Ay Time In Mumbai Dobaara Movie Review: More like Akshay Kumar 'dobaara'

2BD_Once-Upon-a-Time-in-Mumbaai-AgainIn Once Upon Ay Time In Mumbai Dobaara, Emraan Hashmi grows into an Akshay Kumar. Yes. The brutish incoherence of the idea to make a sequel to the 2010’s punch-packed film, starring Ajay Devgn (as Haji Mastan) and Emraan Hashmi (as Dawood Ibrahim), giving yet another largely fictionalized account of the gangster’s life was enough to put you off, if not the waxy boring promos of the film. Next, you fallibly miscast Imran Khan in the role of an upcoming gangster, which they say is based on Abu Salem’s life? Really? Looking justifiably exasperated at being out of place, he looks like the millionaire who was forced to be a slumdog. OUATIMD did look like to be a monumental disappointment, to further milk the goodwill and success created by the earlier Devgn starrer. Credited with films like Taxi No 9211, OUATIM and The Dirty Picture, director Milan Luthria has been fairly prudish in creating some good work. In this half-assed attempt, he does misfire, albeit not as despicably as I expected him to. Yes, OUATIMD is NOT a terrible film, but then its a letdown to its predecessor.Continue reading “Once Upon Ay Time In Mumbai Dobaara Movie Review: More like Akshay Kumar 'dobaara'”

Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani: A good one time watch

Yeh_jawani_hai_deewaniYeh Jawaani Hai Deewani, a film that everyone I know is voraciously waiting to see, first day first show in theater. No second thoughts there. Such is the marketing prowess of Dharma Productions and Karan Johar. The message is out there and precisely succinct. Come have fun and celebrate life! Continue reading “Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani: A good one time watch”